Journal Entry #1,623

So the good Tsar-Djent and I have decided that the best way for us to spread the message of our Divine Overseers across your planet is through mewzik. We’ve researched every form of Urth media, and decided this would be the most effective. Cause we’re too ugly for TV. So we are going to start what you hoomans call a "band" and write "songs" about "things". Inevitably this will lead you to love the Divine as we do....On a partially unrelated note, Pugly McRiblets has been an utter failure. His refused to obey the Tsar-Djent and myself, and the little bastard made a huge mess of my laboratory. So....I chopped off his head and peeled his skin off...and now his skinless body is mounted in my lab and I used his skin to make a nice coat, for colder times.. Then I fed his cowbell to Drummy McSheen, who I now think is a far better specimen of mine, especially for our current endeavor...Makes me miss the old days when I would stay in the Phantasmos Jungle on the Planet Skahlb and play with the multitudes of creatures it housed....swapping their organs, enhancing their brains and making potions out of their fluids. You know, there are 15 species living in that jungle that are my creation. MINE! I made them and now they thrive and breed all on their own as if it was natural. My family....my children....ahhhh...fatherhood.